Monday, July 9, 2012

La Belle Dame Sans Merci

Ah, what can ail thee, wretched wight,
Alone and palely loitering;
The sedge is wither'd from the lake,
And no birds sing.
Ah, what can ail thee, wretched wight,
So haggard and so woe-begone?
The squirrel's granary is full,
And the harvest's done.

I see a lily on thy brow,
With anguish moist and fever dew;
And on thy cheek a fading rose
Fast withereth too.

I met a lady in the meads
Full beautiful, a faery's child;
Her hair was long, her foot was light,
And her eyes were wild.

I set her on my pacing steed,
And nothing else saw all day long;
For sideways would she lean, and sing
A faery's song.

I made a garland for her head,
And bracelets too, and fragrant zone;
She look'd at me as she did love,
And made sweet moan.

She found me roots of relish sweet,
And honey wild, and manna dew;
And sure in language strange she said,
I love thee true.

She took me to her elfin grot,
And there she gaz'd and sighed deep,
And there I shut her wild sad eyes--
So kiss'd to sleep.

And there we slumber'd on the moss,
And there I dream'd, ah woe betide,
The latest dream I ever dream'd
On the cold hill side.

I saw pale kings, and princes too,
Pale warriors, death-pale were they all;
Who cry'd--"La belle Dame sans merci
Hath thee in thrall!"

I saw their starv'd lips in the gloam
With horrid warning gaped wide,
And I awoke, and found me here
On the cold hill side.

And this is why I sojourn here
Alone and palely loitering,
Though the sedge is wither'd from the lake,
And no birds sing.

Thursday, July 5, 2012


Balance is found in equal parts, not in being smart, or taking apart... Balance, a key to peace, a place of safety. No one finds the balance in ruin, but in the wreckage... Baby steps in between peace and war, fragility, yes... it's the balance. The pain, is in the balance. The weakness, is in the balance...

Not a god, nor a worm... Find the balance, architect. 

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Everything Ends

Either way you look at it... Your just another page that passes in the long book of endings waiting to begin...

Monday, July 2, 2012

Fight 'Till the Bitter End


Open up the wounds
let the heartache flow again
watch me turn to my addictions
and let temptation be my guide
I'll quell the pain with thoughts of lust
drown the tears in temporary joys
as I'm tripping up the stairs of life
falling on every step I climb
It's a blind charge through endless repetition
running into doors I've closed
with a history of lies
I can't do the things I love anymore
I only love one thing now
and it calls to me
at times like these
like a lover lost in the night
it finds me with open arms
and pulls me aside
Am I strong enough to win this fight?
Can I do this all again?
As my strength cracks and breaks
I see how I've lied to myself
about the twisted merry-go-round I'm riding
and how long I can hold on
before I'm hurled aside for good
Because even though there's determination
lurking within my eyes
I can still feel myself fading
disappearing within my mind
There is no exit from this place
There is no victory to be found
Just another day of trials
another day to watch myself grow weak
It's just my fate
and the cross I bear
watching life turn around
spinning with the hands of the clock
opening up everything that was old
memories I tried to forget
become new again
and I'm sliding
as I'm racing to the end
holding on as strong
as my shattered will allows
waiting until I finally slip
and drift into nothingness
losing myself for good
and forever ending
this senseless repetition

Music to Martyr

Ghost Within My Mind

I would have told you I love you
if we hadn't been saying goodbye
With the end always a breath away
it never seemed real to me
like vapors disappearing before my eyes
and even though you're gone today
there's a ghost lurking within my mind
I wanted you to know me
to make sense of a heart gone wrong
I wanted you to need me like I needed you
and to wash away the sins of thought and deed
You were too perfect to grasp
and too wonderful to touch
but now that you're gone
all I have are memories fading
and a ghost walking withing my mind
It's only now that you haunt me
on quiet, lonely nights
when the wind carries your name into my ears
leaving me adrift in a sea of regret and remorse
I can't face who I am
much less what I've become
Just a wounded soul living in an broken heart
walking these empty halls
hoping to catch a glimpse
of the ghost stalking within my mind


"Life is a video game, and girlfriends are like DLC. You can beat the game without em, but where is the fun in that? Sometimes they fucking rock, and sometimes they end up being more of a headache... Choose wisely, because unlike your XBOX, you can't just delete em and move on... " 

Frail Destiny

You broke a thousand hearts
on your way to mine
you tore through a thousand lonely souls
and shattered a thousand dreams
before a twist of fate
brought you to my door
Now you've moved on
following the scent of loneliness
down a trail of desperation
to another victim
one who smiles unaware
just like I did in the months before
But time will be kind to me
as it is to most gentle souls
though we break like twigs
in the howling winds of today
the rains of tomorrow make us strong
and let us grow into a forest that can never be broken
You will remain hollow, empty and weak
even as I grow stronger
and some day love will find you
following the scent of your loneliness
and it will break you with ease
a rotten tree falling to a draft
So even as I cry for you
and nurse my broken heart
I offer no words of anger
nor carry any ill desires
For your fate is your own
and destiny spites you enough
while I'll miss you on lonely nights
I can not hate what I pity so much
nor condem that which has condemned itself


How can I show you
that you are beautiful
when you always look the other way
Finding imperfections
with every living breath
feeding yourself deceit
every night as you lie in bed
How can I show you
that you are beautiful
when you see only flaws in the diamond
and not the sparkle that it holds
You judge yourself with consequence
tearing down what nature built
and turning it into darkness cold
How can I show you
that you are beautiful
when you don't look into the mirror
save with tear-streaked eyes
How can you see yourself as I do
when you're peering through a looking glass
warped by doubt and loathing
brewed within your mind
How can I show you
that you are beautiful
when your beauty is just too much
and leaves me lost for words
choking on every thought
while trying to explain something so clear
that it is written all over your face
How can I show you
that you're beautiful
when the world is not enough
and a million voices
fail to change your song
unable to silence
the doubt that beats away
No I can't show you
that you're beautiful
No matter how hard I try
But I'll whisper it to you every night
as you drift off to sleep
and hope that one morning
you'll wake up with eyes wide open
and see yourself as I do
A perfect diamond
A stunning reflection
and a ray of sun
piercing my own darkness
taking the clouds away